The Great Escape

Ok... where was I? Sunday we shot a BTS scene at Ariel's apartment. We had recruited two actresses from Craigslist to portray Ariel's Translator and vocal coach. Both woman confirmed they would be there, so after we had moved the furniture (a.k.a.set) pieces into position and set up cameras and lighting, we were just sitting around waiting for them while eating pizza with a couple of friends who were helping out. The first actresses showed up just as we finished our slices. Rosemary, playing the role of the vocal coach. She came in with a fun smile, enthusiasm and immediately showed Ariel and me some wardrobe options. Then other actress came a few minutes later. Debbie, playing the role of the translator. She in contrast was nervous, quiet and awkward. (Now I'd like to point out that I could tell she was weird right from her headshot.) We offered both some food as Ariel and I had both purchased snacks and beverages. While Ariel was reiterating the scene breakdown and the intention of the video, I continued to set up. Then either Ariel or I suggested that we play DCUP Land for them, so they get a feel for what we were about. And so the applause began over the radio. I must say I really wasn't paying attention, so some of this story gets foggy, but I remember while I was setting up wondering where Debbie was. At first I assumed she was in the bathroom changing. Then when I noticed the bathroom door open, I thought, "maybe she's in Ariel's roommate's bedroom changing." After a while Ariel began to wonder too. And soon someone asked what we were all probably thinking. "Where did Debbie go?"

And then I thought to myself immediately. "Debbie fucking split." And split Debbie did. I don't know when. I'm not sure if anyone does. Apparently she told one of my friends she had to go out for a bit. And then she never was seen of again. To be honest I'm not sure what pulled her out the door. I'm guessing it was the song. The fucking ridiculous thing is that Ariel was VERY specific about what this project was, going as far as transcribing the entire thing for them. So she KNEW what she was walking in to. Maybe she just looked at us as a bunch of kids. If that's the case she's an idiot. She's an idiot anyway...and weird. At any rate we had one of our friends fill in and adjusted Rosemary's role to fit. Rosemary was AMAZING. She was sharp and funny and the perfect contrast to the new rap consultant we had. The scene came out even better than expected.

After we wrapped, Ariel noticed a voicemail on her phone. From Debbie the Dropout. "I'm sorry, this project just wasn't for me."

We've already moved on, bitch. As a great dog once said, "If you ain't gonna sniff it, step off!"

Rosemary, Ariel, Americk Makin' Sum Motha Fuckin' Magic!